This is a Letter, don't judge -.-

This is a letter; a serious one.

I am not sure where to begin, but here it goes:

Dear Me,

I know that you have stopped talking to people about the things that bother you, that is probably a bad idea, but I understand that you are just trying to protect yourself while you sort things out on your own. Good for you for trying to sort things out on your own, I know you like a third opinion and lately you have come to like a little drama for a little bit of attention, which is just annoying; even to yourself. I like to believe that you have stopped for the most part, again: Good for you.

Lately you have been feeling a little mixed-up about a lot of different things. I know you are not comfortable sharing what you’re feeling mixed-up about with all of the people who may or may not be reading this, so we will just leave it at that. Also, you have really forgotten a lot of things that you used to live by, which is really disappointing.  I am hoping that after reading that book you just bought you will start to really think about things again. Good books always force you to reevaluate your life, which is something I know you enjoy. No joke, Caitlin, you actually enjoy doing that sort of thing a little too much and sometimes it gets out of hand, why? No one knows, except you and you haven’t figured it out yet either.

Another thing: Please do not do that whole “double standard” thing you really hate when other people do, but you do as well. What. The. Hell. Caitlin. Really? Do I need to say more on this topic? No, I don’t.

I know that you try to be funny, but since most people can’t even begin to understand what you are talking about until it is too late, they don’t think that it is funny and you just feel really lame, but you know what? I like your jokes, so don’t stop telling them, even if it is only to make yourself laugh. I don’t mind that you laugh as much as you do and you shouldn’t worry about if people don’t like hanging out with you because you laugh all the time. It doesn’t matter because you have friends who do like hanging out with you and your laughter.

And I just realized how much of this letter is really just reassuring you of things, but I know that sometimes you really just need to hear it; not from the people who are supposed to say these things to you, but don’t. Not everyone will tell you that you are being a drama-queen and need to calm the flock down, but you have some friends that do tell you. I know you love them very much and care for them more than anything, even though you don’t tell them enough how much you do care and how you hope to never lose their friendship. I think that the ones that know you well enough do know how you feel; maybe. Maybe you should tell them, if you haven’t told them already, I know that you have told some of them. That should probably be your next letter.

I hope that you do look at this letter sometime and see what I was trying to tell you, see the suggestions that I didn’t directly say. I am sure you will, you love to read what you have written, now smile at yourself because you know that I am making a joke that no one will understand.

Always,

Caitlin

P.S. You see the world as a giant musical and it is highly amusing to you because no one knows what song you are making them sing in your mind, you are so weird, but I love you in the way that I should. How can you love anyone else without first loving yourself? Not in that “Oh, my God, I am so wonderful” sort of way, but you get what I am saying.

My Family Is Strange, But In A Good Way

My mom, as many of my friends know, is possibly the most amazing mom there is. She makes jokes, does weird dances, she accepts everything about you, and she does some really weird things.

One of my favorites is the time Amanda and I were sitting in our room in Three-Cities-Clumped-Together Land, minding our business when my mom decides that she needs to come in and disturb the peace. Amanda and I, unsuspecting victims of our mother’s humor, were always surprised at what she threw at us next, but we always loved it. We heard our mom before she entered the room, she started singing an odd chant and hopping up and down until she hopped into the room. Then we saw her and that image alone sent us into a fit of laughter; wearing only her underwear and a tank top. That wasn’t the funny part, she always wore that, it was the fact that she had given herself a giant wedgie and had her arms flapping around in front of her while she chanted and hopped around our room one time and then hopper back out into the living room to go finish watching her TV show.

It was pretty hilarious when we asked her why she did it later; she had been watching a documentary on African tribes and their ritual dances and decided that she wanted to show us how it was done (her arms were supposed to be the women’s breasts since she didn’t want to go topless in front of us, thank God) so she came into our room like that. Although, I am not sure what having her underwear wedged up had to do with any of it, but it was funny nonetheless.